this is a read more i dont know how long its gonna get im just takin precautions okay well you know i make a lot of posts about hating school and the funny thing is that im not joking about any of them i do not like school i dont like going to it i dont like being there i dont have any attachment to the people i see and i certainly dont do the work or want to. i stopped caring about it like uh i dunno junior year at the VERY latest. i dont get worked up about failing anymore. i dont feel anything about it, im too passive for that. my dad told me the other night that i should do something i enjoy whether or not it’ll get me straight into a big money career or something so he said i should just get a degree in art because it’s easy enough and that’s the only thing i care about and it’ll just be good to have a degree in anything. but it’s still school. and i hate school.
i don’t want to go anymore.
if i had my way i wouldnt have started college.
if i had my way i would have stopped after last semester. i almost did.
but i didn’t. and i should have.
the thing is that i feel like it’ll be harder for me to move if i drop out and get a job because that’ll be whatever money i’m making, my parents would be paying for me to go to school because they’re into that, but i mean really im just gonna piss that away why even bother. i also dont really want to be doing some shit job for the rest of my life but like school is not my thing and i shouldnt be doing it.
i dont really know what to do though.
even if i had already decided on one or the other, i still dont know where to go. im going to move but i dont know where to. it’s been suggested that i move to one of the college towns where a good amount of people i went to high school with moved, since it’d be a harder for me as an irresponsible baby bunny to go from here to a real big city, so a slower transition should be more doable. I dont really have any interest in living in one of the college towns.
i am very lost